I started school this month and its been a crazy ride. I had been having strong feelings for months now that this was something I needed to do. I tried to fight it. I kept thinking there was no way I was going to be able to go back. Not with Lucy at home and Noah half day kindergarten and the million other things going on in my life. But this feeling was persistent and so I mentioned it to Aaron and before I knew it I was signed up and found myself at my first gathering class.

Since then its been an emotional whirlwind. I honestly have never felt so close to my Savior. Its still hard and its still really scary and I am finding myself struggling to write full sentences, but I know that if I put forth the effort He will make up the rest.

This week we have been studying 1 Nephi 1-5 and it was crazy how applicable these scriptures were to exactly what I was going through.

!Nephi 4:6-7 "And I was led by the Spirit, not knowing beforehand the things which I should do... Nevertheless I went forth.". I didn't even realize at the time how much I exercising faith. It was scary and its been hard, but I knew it was something I needed to do and so I did it. I have also recognized that because of the faith I had I have really been blessed. I have really seen so many tender mercies happen since starting school just like it stats in 1Nephi1:20 "...But behold, I, Nephi, will show unto you that the tender mercies of the Lord are over all those whom he hath chosen, because of their faith, to make them mighty even unto the power of deliverance."

I know that I will learn and grow so much throughout this experience. It will still be hard and I know at times I will struggle, but I know if I seek Him in prayer I cannot fail.

I love the quote by Russell M Nelson "I have learned not to put question marks but to use exclamation points when calls are issued through inspired channels of the priesthood"

I CAN do this!!

"Regardless of our age and stage in life, daily obedience to gospel principles is the only sure way to eternal happiness. When obedience ceases to be an irritant and becomes our quest, in that moment God will endow us with power."

After seeing how much have grown and the blessing I have received just in the past few weeks I now think of all the many times I didn't follow a prompting or talked myself out of something I knew I should have done. How much have I missed out on before? I now have a better knowledge of the power of faith. I have made it a goal to listen more to the promptings of the Spirit.

Elder John H Groberg of the seventy said "The scriptures tell us in 1Nephi 4:6 that we went forth not knowing beforehand what he should do but knowing he should obey God and get the plates...I suspect had he listened only to reason, Nephi and his brethren would still be waiting outside the walls of Jerusalem. I sometimes wonder if by our listening to reason and logic too much, and not trusting God enough, we may find ourselves waiting outside the walls of His holy city."